Bullying in the Schools Will End When the Adults Stop Bullying Each Other.

To Be WUCA! is to Welcome, by having a great attitude; Understand, by listening and being open to other’s ideas; being Comfortable in knowing your own passion, purpose, vision, and goals; and Appreciating by expressing gratitude. It is a simple idea. Maybe too simple, because this is not what I see people living.

This is why I am more than a little perplexed at blaming youth for bullying.

Yes, they do need to take responsibility for their actions and yes, we do have a problem with bullying.

But are we focusing on the root cause?

Look around!

All I have to do is look in my email inbox or on my Facebook page to see each political party calling people in the other party names, or women telling men and men telling women that each other’s opinion does not matter, signs and sayings that people post inferring that when people think a certain way, they are somehow un-American or un-Christian, or that if you are not born in this country you are not paying taxes and using all of our services for free.

Have you been watching the presidential campaigns? It is no wonder that we have kids that bully.

We have grown men, who want to be President of this nation and represent all of us, calling each other “liar” and pointing fingers telling them that what they think and what they do is wrong. Politicians shout on television and radio waves saying others are “stupid” for stopping “this idea” from going forward.

And people send money to support this type of behavior.

When adults in communities gossip in coffee shops or in beauty parlors about how so-and-so got to the top by lying and cheating, are they simply jealous of someone’s success? The message is they want to see other people fail.

Or radio talk show hosts and writers hiding behind "free speech" call others derogatory names.

What kind of modeling are we doing as adults? Do we say, “If your values are not like mine, you are wrong?”

Back to students.

Our schools are reflections of our communities: test scores, people on free and reduced lunch, bullying, lack of motivation, and lack of respect for teachers are examples of community life.

Kids are blamed on how big a problem bullying is in schools with when all you may have to do is look within the families and the community.

What is the matter with kids today? Look to the adults that model behavior.

What is the answer to bullying?

Adopt a Be WUCA! strategy in your family, community, church, and school - in all areas of your life! Live to

 Welcome, Understand, Comfort, and Appreciate others.

We’ll be amazed at the turnaround this country will see.

High Schools - Rural Community Job Creators

Growing our economy and saving our schools and communities can be done by creating high schools that teach young people they don’t have to work for a big company or for other people. Teach them that owning their own business is a possibility and, in fact, is a local strategy that will grow the economy. The best way to accelerate our job creation rate is to embrace and support policies in all levels of the political spectrum that create entrepreneurs. This is especially critical in today's job market, where change is taking place so rapidly, it's challenging to know what "jobs" will be available in the next three to five years. Especially in rural communities, business creation and succession are easier to determine and execute.

If we really want to make a difference in our economy and grow our towns, we must focus on entrepreneurship in our schools and towns. Don’t just create an entrepreneurship "class." Create a holistic entrepreneurship school that incorporates entrepreneurship practices into the core curriculum and an ecosystem in the community to support entrepreneurship.

We need:

  • to encourage people to dream.
  • to help talented individuals start companies that create business models that grow big-, medium-, small-sized, sustainable organizations.
  • to encourage students to create local jobs by owning local businesses.
  • to support them to grow regionally and globally.
  • entrepreneurship schools that give students alternative curriculum that teaches the components of business planning and use their youthful creativity to design the future.
  • holistic schools that engage youth to develop as local leaders, energizing them through entrepreneurship and business growth.
  • policies and new traditions that include youth in decision making for family-friendly communities.
  • to teach the importance of philanthropy and giving back locally.

Many of our towns are losing population. Schools are losing enrollment, and budgets are shrinking. We can turn around this trend by giving our youth an alternative to working for others and an alternative of having to move away to get a good job. That alternative is owning their own business and locating in the town where they are educated. 

Imagine a school in your town that incubates business ideas and business models that will spin out to locate on Main Street or can be run from a home using the community’s local technology, contributing to and growing your local tax base!

Do your students see a future for themselves?

Gallup identified the reason students drop out of school and disengage in education: they have lost all hope in graduating. They cannot see how the education they are getting will lead them to where they want to go. Students will engage in their education when they see how it will provide them with a good job and a chance for a good life. For many, it is giving them hope that their “good job” will be created by their own creativity and the realization that they can own their own business.

Innovation itself doesn’t create sales. The entrepreneur is the connector, the person who envisions a valuable product or concept and its customer, and then creates a business model and strategy that creates sales and profit.

This isn’t just a school’s issue. For many towns and cities, it is a community survival issue.

Entrepreneurship is a long-term commitment that needs the support of the local community, local school district, coupled with state policy support. From his book, The Coming Jobs War, Jim Clifton, chairman of Gallup, states, “If you were to ask me, from all of Gallup’s data and research on entrepreneurship, what will most likely tell you if you are winning or losing your city, my answer would be, ‘5th-12th-graders’ image of and relationship to free enterprise and entrepreneurship.’ If your city doesn’t have growing economic energy in your 5th-12th-graders, you will experience neither job creation, nor city GDP growth.”

 Entrepreneurship schools in our education system is a must and needs to be a supported strategy by leadership on all policy levels for our healthy, growing, successful future.

Who powers your town?

The dominant theme on any news is how “bad” big business is and how many employees “they” have added or taken away. Many people think that this country is run by “big business,” but actually, our country is really run and dominated by small- and medium-sized businesses. Ninety-eight percent of a community’s new jobs are created by businesses you see on your Main Street, home- based businesses that are a part of your town’s hidden economy, and many other of your existing businesses that you count on to meet your needs.

Clifton continues, “as of 2007, there were about six million businesses in the United States with at least one employee; businesses with 500 or fewer employees represent more than 99% of these six million. There are slightly more than 88,000 companies with 100 to 500 employees and about 18,000 with 500 to 10,000 workers – and only about 1,000 companies with more than 10,000 employees.”

Math says, of six million U.S. companies, only 107,000 of them have more than 100 employees. That leaves 5,893,000 businesses with fewer than 100 employees.

We work with communities on many different levels time in very rural areas. We’ve watched communities spend many thousands of dollars to “steal” companies from other towns, thus creating a neutral net gain of jobs in the economy. Many of those companies, after they have used up their tax advantages from relocating, will look elsewhere to gain more tax advantages and their loyalty to that community ends as soon as they receive a better deal, if there was any loyalty to begin with.

This is not just about taxes or regulations, though those are important components to the economy. Our focus is about teaching young people from a very early age that there is an alternative to working for someone else and that is creating your own business and products and working for yourself.

    According to Clifton, “the United States has successfully invented and commercialized between 30% and 40% of all breakthroughs worldwide, throughout virtually all categories, in the last 200+ years.”

    That is a startling statistic when you really think about what that means.  We have a culture of creativity and invention. We also have a culture of taking those inventions to market.

    That takes an entrepreneur.

    Who are your entrepreneurs?

    It appears to us we have been losing "entrepreneurial spirit" in our creative business cycle. Many community businesses are third-generation owners, passed down in families, leading to many of our communities and leaders losing their entrepreneurial culture, innovation, and drive.

    Entrepreneurs are the bridge to the innovations and those customers that will use the products, and the business model is everything! You can have all the inventions and innovative products in the world, but without the business model the entrepreneur creates to bring a product to market, new inventions and innovations sit on the shelf.

    Entrepreneurs are those who usually start businesses, but teaching entrepreneurship in school also introduces the concept of “intrapreneurship.” Intrapreneurs work inside companies and are the brains and energy behind creating customers.

    An entrepreneur/intrapreneur will create business models that will identify more customers and create innovative ways to address local, commercial, and social concerns.

    Who do YOU see has a great idea that can become a successful business for your community?

    If you'd like to explore ideas for your school and community, we're here!

    Relationship is Everything

    When examining the talent at any organization look at the culture, not the rhetoric – look at the results, not the commentary about potential. Here’s what an article in Forbes magazine reports:

    ·         More than 30% believe they’ll be working someplace else inside of 12 months.

    ·         More than 40% don’t respect the person they report to.

    ·         More than 50% say they have different values than their employer.

    ·         More than 60% don’t feel their career goals are aligned with the plans their employers have for them.

    ·         More than 70% don’t feel appreciated or valued by their employer.

    So, for all those employers who have everything under control, you better start re-evaluating. There is an old saying that goes; “Employees don’t leave companies, they leave people." Regardless of tenure, position, title, etc., employees who voluntarily leave, generally do so out of some type of relationship disconnect with leadership and co-workers.

    Every moment of every day you are in a relationship. Whether you are with another person, in traffic, at work, or alone in a room with just yourself, you are in a relationship.

    Getting along in that relationship is an intentional act that begins only with you and has nothing to do with the other person. Only you create the result that you experience from that relationship.

    How do I know this? By me changing my actions and doing everything that I write about and experience. Living WUCA! has changed every relationship in my life.

    Relationships thrive when you intentionally:

    Welcome
    •    Words matter. Use words that build and heal. 
    •    Accept responsibility for the results you are receiving and living.
    Understand
    •    Listen actively to what is being said by others; don’t just wait to talk. 
    •    Deliberately create space for civil dialogue. Circles are best.
    Comfort
    •    Live your purpose through your passion. It is the best way others can live theirs. 
    •    Achieve your vision with goals as stepping stones. Move toward the future you wish to create.
    Appreciate
    •    Express gratitude daily. Unexpressed gratitude is ingratitude.
    •    Eulogize others while they are still alive. Let them hear their praises. 

    If the nature of any relationship you are in is not going the way you want, you can be certain you are compounding the problem by continuing to give energy to the actions that you dislike or don’t want. When someone says they don’t get along with their parent or spouse or someone they work with, they are defining the relationship in terms of what they dislike. When your thoughts and words are on what you don’t want, it will continue to be the story of the relationship. If you want the relationship to improve, focus your energy on what you love about it and what you want it to be like.

    What keeps you stuck in bad relationships boils down to two factors - which will change immediately - when you decide to act differently:

    1.    How you decide to view your relationship.
    2.   The actions you take that change you.

    Your environment will change when you change your actions: all your thoughts, beliefs, and habits. 
    When you stop blaming others for your past and your circumstances, you will start building the relationship that you have always wanted. Even with yourself.

    When you learn the WUCA! Way, you will act the WUCA! Way, then you will teach others the WUCA! Way.

    Living WUCA! improves your relationships so you can experience the world intended for you!

    Make 2015 your Best Year yet! Take care, be well, Be WUCA!

     

    Learn WUCA!      Act WUCA!      Teach WUCA!

    Perception - Another Person's Reality

    To really understand another person you need to understand how your filtering mechanism works.

    Your filtering mechanism is your belief system of what you see or another word for that is paradigm. A paradigm is the belief that has been turned into a habit and has been programmed into you. it is how you perceive reality and why you act the way you do and live the way you do.

    A paradigm is like railroad tracks. It creates a set direction for how you see the world. Everything you see, everything you’d do everything you perceive of other people and situations, is filtered through your paradigm. It becomes your reality.

    So it is also with other people. Their paradigm or belief system filters the information that they take in.

    In order to understand how another person perceives reality, you have to understand how they grew up, their culture. You have to understand their personality, and you have to understand their current situation. 

    Create Wealth with Community Builders

    All across our rural regions, schools are struggling with cutting budgets due to declining enrollment, districts are facing decisions to close buildings and move students to schools in other towns and neighborhoods. Young people are moving to economic opportunities elsewhere. Families face low-wage jobs as poverty levels continue an upward trend.

    Community and economic development need to be more than just about creating jobs. It's about creating an environment where businesses - which create jobs - and people - who create quality of life - can thrive.

    It's about locally creating a place where people are part of their future.

    This is where wealth is created.

    Healthy relationships between people establish the basis where true economic development can happen. In a grassroots, values-based leadership program called Community Builders, wealth is created. Residents better understand and build their communities and local economies by knowing their assets, needs, and intentionally create wealth and jobs.

    Here’s why wealth creation matters:

    · the “walls” come down between communities and animosities disappear. This allows new ideas to flow.

    · new, much-needed income from business-to-business opportunities appears.

    · youth are integrated into community leadership positions, encouraging involvement and commitment to the community.

    · while agriculture is, and will remain an important part of the rural economy, it need no longer hold life and death power over a community's economy.

    · pro-active, positive attitudes improve quality of life in communities.

    · change happens everywhere. Managing change is key to successful transition and growth.

    · new ways of looking at development better supports and nurtures economic, entrepreneurship, employment, and social development at local and regional levels.

    · collaboration between communities creates a peer support network and friendship links across a region, promoting an “it’s good for all of us” mentality to achieve common economic goals.

    · economic success in rural communities is tied directly to investment in rural leadership.

    Here's how it works.

    Community Builders is a terrific, interactive, fun, unique, action-learning process focused within a geographic region between or within communities, businesses, schools, organizations, and individuals. It's designed to promote unity when people become more aware of each other, entertainment, opportunities, and area businesses. It works fabulously between towns in a county or between multiple counties.

    It creates an environment where trusting relationships build, attitudes change, jobs and wealth are created, and entrepreneurial spirit flourishes!

    The process is flexible and did you catch this is FUN?

    Community Builders  begins with a kickoff session uniquely crafted from 28 years of experience with a core group of people interested in new ways to develop their towns in a region. The presentation explains the background, what to expect, the importance of Community Builders, and what it can do for an area. At the end of the presentation, those communities who want to participate select a date for their town’s tour. Participants usually include six to 10 communities with people from each community as committed representatives for the length of the process.

    Now creativity begins - there are no rules for what happens next!

    At least monthly - depending on how many participate - representatives from each town visit the town hosting that month’s tour. Much like a tour you'd share with someone who wants to move to your town, guests learn about businesses, their product/s, employee base, sales area, and any other information the business wants to share. Schools, tourist stops, historical landmarks - anything special to that community - are included. The final stop for the evening includes a meal and program pertinent to the community's needs. The tours continue through the summer until all the towns have been visited.

    A key focus of Community Builders is to foster collaboration and connections between communities. A regular discussion theme relates to ways of strengthening these bonds, thus ensuring 'win-win' for all communities.

    What is learned through Community Builders  is that even the tiniest towns have exceptional treasures! Lifelong residents discover numerous companies with international scope, and more “Main Street” and home-based businesses than you thought you had! Notably, your residents will be filled with pride and amazed at the great town they call home!

    When residents speak highly of their hometown and area - these days globally - you are utilizing the very best and least expensive economic development tool: word of mouth!

    The process is simple. 1) Engage every member of your community, 2) connect with towns around you, and 3) you will create wealth!

    It takes a village to engage a workforce!

    Get Your Head in the Game

    One of the biggest challenges in meeting any goal, whether it be related to productivity, waking early, changing a habit, exercising, or just becoming happier, is finding the motivation to stick with it.

     If you can stick with a goal for long enough, you’ll almost always get there eventually. It just takes patience and motivation. Motivation is the key, but it’s not always easy, day in and day out, to find that motivation.

    One way to get you there quicker, is with another person, a coach.

    A goal-setting coaching process that will help you to understand the “why” and the “how” goals are achieved. If you have ever wanted to achieve that "magic" weight; if you have ever wanted to have the endurance; if you have ever wanted to earn a grade; if you have ever wanted to achieve any goal, then even before you even start your program, you will want to give yourself a “head” start to achieving your goals!

    Individuals in all circumstances can and will reach any goal that they want to achieve - it all starts in your mind.  So, participate and “Get your Head in the Game” and focus to achieve your goals. Motivation is the key!

    Coaching sessions include:

    • “It all starts with passion, purpose, vision, and action.”

    • “Understanding how your mind directs you to achieve your goals.”

    • “Identifying your passion to achieve your goal

    • "Remove any mind blocks that keep you from achieving your goals."

    • “Start with the end in mind and create a realistic goal for yourself.”

    • "Overcoming negative mind-chatter."

    • "Replacing the negative with the positive."

    It does not matter where you are in life - high school, college, young, old, amateurs or professional; we all need help at times. We all get in our heads and can't see the victories that lie before us.

    Take action and move aside the stumbling block in your head! Become the person that you want to become and "Get Your Head in the Game" to win!

    Free 1/2 Hour Session

    Book Now

    Coaching Flyer.jpg

    Create Wealth The Be WUCA! Way

    The best way to lead a great team is to create an environment that encourages individuals to communicate better, deal with others better, and help people like and trust each other better. Effective leaders realize that the thin line between fitting in and being welcomed is so close to feeling excluded and left out.

    Effective leaders know that people want to belong somewhere. In a group. At work. At the worship center. In families. With friends! If you know you can use some help in this leadership area in your relationships, you're in good company.

    When effective leaders lead The Be WUCA! Way, wealth is created in many different forms.

    What comes to mind when you think of creating wealth? A room full of gold? Vacations? A new car? Bills paid off so you feel wealthy? The newest phone or device? These certainly can be pictures of building or having wealth.

    Much larger than the economic sense, creating wealth is the act of building a person’s knowledge, experience, and abilities to build sustainability in community. When you create wealth with The Be WUCA! Way foundation of leadership, you create opportunities for all people to belong, participate in, and contribute.

    Frank Spillers

    "Best training we have had in more than 13 years!"

    When you create wealth The Be WUCA! Way, you change the way you look at things. You create wealth and healthy environments when you build people up, focus on making their lives better, and help others become what they dream about. You become a more effective leader when you encourage people The Be WUCA! Way, when you Welcome, Understand, Comfort, and Appreciate yourself and others. You will enjoy a sense of belonging!

    Wealth creation begins with positive, forward-thinking, people-centered leadership making things happen! An effective leader will guide in identifying people’s passion and purpose because this is what really motivates us to perform, get things done, and do our very best work!

    An effective leader will communicate a big-picture vision, assist to establish doable goals, and create an environment to achieve each and every one using and building people's talents along the way.

    An effective leader allows - encourages - an individual to grow. When your words and actions build people, you will automatically strengthen businesses, create successful schools, excite communities, families, and organizations.

    With effective leadership The Be WUCA! Way comes business and community growth because life will really be humming along and people will respond! Leaders set goals, always looking for and creating new pathways for people to engage. They generate new ways of seeing and acting on both persistent and emerging challenges that offer the possibility for change and authentic hope.

    How do you rate your wealth creation? Do people feel they "belong" in your presence? Are you a good leader? Want to be a great leader?

    Wherever you are in the world, your business, workplace, school, community, family, and organization will prosper when you put The Be WUCA! Way principles to work.

    Learn to use them. Live them. You'll see a dramatic difference of wealth creation in your life! Step into being and creating leadership The Be WUCA! Way.

    Drive your CAR The WUCA! Way

    Have you ever walked to your car and started it, expecting it to take you to your destination all by itself? Of course not. You need to drive it. You need to know beforehand where you are going.

    What does this mean for your life? Your business? Your family? Your workplace?

    Ladies and Gentlemen! Start Your Engines!

    Let me introduce you to the new and improved model of "The WUCA! Car."

    WUCA CAR

    WUCA CAR

    Stylish and sleek with integrity built in. Fully responsive to your actions. With bumper to bumper elegance that will passionately get you to your destination successfully with purpose.

    When you drive your Be WUCA! CAR, the first thing you do is to think about the Result you want. Your destination. Where you want to end up. This step is nearly always within your power to determine. Many things you can think about ahead of time, so you have an automatic response - like your attitude getting out of bed in the morning. What kind of day do you want? Think ahead on this.

    Identify your Circumstance. In whatever circumstance you are experiencing in life, what is happening to you? What are you thinking about related to a circumstance? Do you want to change anything about it? This has less certainty to it, as circumstances can change and are often beyond our control. But you often can still think ahead what may come your way.

    What is completely within your control, however, is how you Act. Depending on what you've identified as your end result, you act on your circumstance to get the result you desire. You drive your CAR.

    C = Circumstance

    A= Action

    R = Result

    Just as if taking a trip, you map out the route that will get you where you want to end up in the amount of time you are planning.

    Once you map out your route, you make sure that you have your car serviced. Do you have gas and oil? Are the fluid levels where they need to be? How is the tire pressure? All of these things should be checked before you start on your way.

    In your life, is your mind serviced with the passion and training you need? Are the results you want within your purpose? If they are, then you are ready to drive your Be WUCA! CAR.

    Just mapping out your trip and visualizing where you want to go does not get you there. You have to put your CAR into drive, step on the gas, and steer the CAR down the right road.

    Will you run into road closures or road under construction sometimes?

    Yes!

    But when you do, there is always a way around it called a detour. (When one door closes, another one opens.)

    Will your car need additional service; put gas in it?

    Yes!

    You will always need to stop for gas - additional training and get your rest.

    Align your CAR and balance your tires - spend time with family, play, and develop friends.

    And make time for tune-ups, like read books and articles, to make you a better person. Take additional training to help you reach your destination. Work with a Life Coach. Create a Mastermind group that will keep you on the road to success.

    When you keep your foot on the gas and your Be WUCA! CAR is moving forward, you will reach your desired destination. You just have to:

    Identify your Circumstances.

    Act to map out your routes.

    Choose where you will drive to get the Result you want to achieve success.

    It is all up to you. You get to choose where you want to end up and what attitude you want while you are driving in your new WUCA! CAR.

    BEEP!! BEEP!!!

    Want to learn more? Schedule The Be WUCA! Way environmental specialist to show you how to improve your environment. You will learn The ART of getting along. kim@ghorizons.com  www.bewuca.com   http://goo.gl/UjF8L 

    The Story of the 18th Camel

    The story is told of a Middle Eastern traveler making his way on a long journey across the desert. As he plodded on his camel steadily through the dry heat, he came upon an oasis. Approaching the desert spring, the traveler was surprised to find three brothers weeping profusely.

    Through conversation with the mourning brothers, the traveler discovered their father had recently passed away. The source of the tears was the brother’s inability to satisfy their fathers’ last wish.

    The father had given strict instructions that the inheritance of his estate be divided in such a way that the oldest received one half, the second received one third, and the youngest received one ninth of the father’s estate.

    The brothers had successfully divided the rest of their father’s property, but were unable to do so with the camels. The father had left them 17 camels, and, try as they may, the brothers could not distribute the camels according to father’s wishes.

    The traveler considered the dilemma and then offered the brothers a solution. He insisted they receive his camel as a gift. After much conversation and many attempts at refusal, the brothers relented to the travelers’ demands and received the kindness of his gift.

    With 18 camels, the brothers were able to properly divide the inheritance and satisfy their father’s wishes. The older brother received one half of the herd and took his 9 camels. The second brother received one third of the herd and took his 6 camels. The youngest brother received one ninth of the herd and took his 2 camels.

    Surprisingly, 9 camels plus 6 camels plus 2 camels equals 17 camels. With the inheritance properly distributed, the traveler was able to take his camel and continue on his journey.

    What solution do you have to offer to the desperate situations around you? Many times the answer is not either/or but the answer lies in the third option, an option that you never would have found if you did not try and understand another’s point of view. The solution might be right in front of you but you are to close to see it.

    Are you riding on the 18th camel?

     

    Choose Your Portal

    I was watching my nephews play a video game over the weekend and I started to reflect upon what I did learn. (Yes, you can learn something from a video game.) Every time they wanted to get to a different level to get a prize that would give them more points and chances to get to a higher level, they had to create a portal in a wall.

    A portal is the path or, the hole, they create to get them through a wall. It's like a door, except it can be created anywhere.

    So now I am thinking of decisions as portals that get us to a different level of life. Every decision holds an infinite number of possibilities in front of us. Whether a decision is big or small, either will change our life. Maybe even determine our future.

    Think about a decision that you recently have made. What has happened to you because of that decision?

    Who have you met? Who has been in your life? What have been the financial effects? Are you better off or worse off?

    What was the greatest lesson you learned from that decision? What relationship did that decision improve? Would you make that decision again?

    Each choice we make takes us through a portal. Sometimes we don't know what's on the other side when we enter. Some choices turn out the way that we'd would like them to turn out and some don’t. Some choices are good. Some are not.

    The portals we choose to walk through can have long-lasting outcomes for us and the rest of the world. When we make them, we do know if it's a moral decision, sending us down a path that affects other people, areas of our life, other events that happen in the world, and we have to live with the outcome.

    What would have happened if Mr. Washington never met the future Mrs. Washington? George would not have ever come into existence.

    What would the world be like if Bill Gates had decided it was too hard to try and sell this idea of a computer in every house because IBM said there was no need for every household to own a computer?

    How about Walt Disney giving up because he had dyslexia?

    Marianne Williamson said, “As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give permission to other people to do the same.”

    Making good choices is lifelong. Listen to advice, but choose your own portal. You will change the world, depending upon the portal you create.

    Remember The Be WUCA! Way formula to drive your CAR: C + A = R.

    Your Circumstances + Your Actions = Your Results

    Portals are choices for us and the world. Let your light shine!

     

    10 Leadership Lessons to Be WUCA!

    I want to share with you this article that I received about leadership. It is a great example of how leaders can Be WUCA! with all their people. Enjoy the guest writing! Have a Be WUCA! week.

    Frank

    10 Leadership Lessons By Dave Lavinsky

    Both my son and daughter play Lacrosse.  In fact, my son's gotten really good and played in a 'select' league this summer.

    Even though I never played Lacrosse, I was a high school and college athlete (soccer & wrestling) and am a huge proponent of kids playing sports.

    I was recently sent an article written by the US Lacrosse Association entitled "10 Steps to a Positive Lacrosse Experience" on what parents can do to foster a better experience for their kids. I didn't find the article eye-opening -- just common sense stuff in my opinion -- until I started thinking about it in a business sense.

    Specifically, these steps can be directly applied and serve as a great guide for being an effective leader. Let me show you why...

    #1: Be supportive of your child by giving encouragement and showing an interest in his or her team.

    As a leader, you need to constantly give encouragement to and show sincere interest in your employees if you want to motivate them and boost their performance.

    #2: Attend games whenever possible. If you cannot attend, ask about your child's experience, not whether the team won or lost.

    Great leaders see what's going on in the workplace. They walk around. They attend meetings. And they speak to their employees to understand how things are going.

    #3: Be a positive role model by displaying good sportsmanship at all times to coaches, officials, opponents, and your child's teammates.

    Effective leaders are positive role models. If you don't act in the manner you'd like your employees to act, they won't.

    #4: Let your child set his own goals and play the game for himself/herself. Be your child's "home court advantage" by giving him or her your unconditional support regardless of how well he or she performs.

    Great leaders allow their employees to set goals. Sure, those goals need to align with the organization's goals. But employees are much more successful and dedicated to achieving goals that they set or helped establish. And employees who do not meet their goals should be supported and helped so that they improve and meet their goals the next time.

    #5: Let the coach coach. Refrain from giving your child advice when he or she is playing.

    If your organization has multiple levels of management, this comes into play. For example, if a manager tells an employee one thing, the organization's president needs to be careful not to tell that employee conflicting information. All management needs to be on the same page - this is simply done via effective communications.

    #6: Respect the decisions of the referee or umpire. This is an important part of honoring the game. Your child will pay more attention to how you act than to what you say.

    Things will not always go right in organizations. Some battles you will win, and others you will lose. When you lose a battle, the answer is never to point fingers or complain about external reasons that caused the failure. Rather, you must accept the failure, and figure out how to improve and avoid failure next time.

    #7: Read the rule book. A full understanding of the rules will help you enjoy the game and educate others.

    In my opinion, the only real rule book in business is the ethics rule book. By being a positive role model (see #3) and showing a high degree of ethics, your employees will most likely do the same.

    #8: Get to know who is in charge. Meet with the leadership of the program, whether it's school-sponsored or recreational, to discuss topics such as cost, practice and game scheduling, insurance coverage, emergency procedures, etc.

    Effective leaders get involved in their industries. They go to industry events. They meet other leaders. They sit on industry boards.

    No organization operates in isolation. Understand and get involved in your industry. This will help with setting industry policies, finding partner organizations, and becoming well-known, which will positively influence sales, the number of quality employees seeking to join you, etc.

    #9: Get involved! A great way to support your child's Lacrosse experience is by becoming a volunteer for the program. Some of the ways you can get involved: keep the scorebook, run the clock...

    See #2 -- make sure you circulate around your workplace and get involved.

    #10: Sit back and enjoy the game. Remember, Lacrosse is played for FUN.

    Great leaders enjoy the journey and not just the end result. Running an organization is hard work, but it should be fun. You should be doing what you love to do. And if your employees are motivated and truly care about the welfare of your organization, running your organization is an extremely rewarding experience.

    Dave Lavinsky is the president and co-founder of Growthink (www.growthink.com). Since 1999, Growthink has helped thousands of business owners start, grow and sell their businesses through a myriad of services including business planning and exit strategy planning.

    Welcome - It is All About Attitude

    Victor Frankl once wrote, "Everything can be taken from a person but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitudes in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way." Frankl was right. Attitude is a choice. You could be faced with a thousand problems, many or most over which you have absolutely no control. However, there is always one thing you are in complete and absolute control of and that is your own attitude. When you surrender control of your attitude to what appears to be a negative situation, you will react to that situation. More often than not, reacting is inappropriate. On the other hand, if you were to remain objective, you would respond to the situation appropriately, thereby creating a winning situation.

    Attitude is the composite of your thoughts, feelings and actions. Your conscious mind controls feeling and ultimately dictates whether your feelings will be positive or negative by your choice of thoughts, then your body displays those choices through action and behavior.

    Attitude is actually a creative cycle that begins with your choice of thoughts. You do choose your thoughts and that choice is where your attitude originates. As you internalize ideas or become emotionally involved with your thoughts, you create the second stage in forming an attitude; you move your entire being - mind and body - into a new "vibration." Your conscious awareness of this vibration is referred to as "feeling". Your feelings are then expressed in actions or behaviors that produce the various results in your life.

    Positive results are always the effect of a positive attitude. Attitude and results are inseparable. They follow one another like night follows day. What I mean by that is: one is the cause, the other, the result. There is a term we use to distinguish this "cause and effect" relationship, it is called The Law of Cause and Effect. Simply stated, if you think in negative terms, you will get negative results; if you think in positive terms you will achieve positive results. Ralph Waldo Emerson reiterated that same point when he said, "A person is what they think about all day long." The results you achieve in life are nothing more than an expression of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Take a close look at your life and evaluate the results you are achieving in various areas. See if you are able to relate your attitude to your results.

    Winning and losing are opposite sides of the same coin - and that coin is attitude. There are many things wrong in this world; unfortunately that is all some people are able to see. Those who view the world in this light are often unhappy and somewhat cynical. Usually, their life is one of lack and limitation and it almost appears as if they move from one bad experience to another. I know people who are like this and I'm certain you do as well. It would appear as if they were born with a streak of bad luck and it has followed them around their whole life. These individuals are quick to blame circumstances or other people for their problems, rather than accepting responsibility for their life and their attitude.

    Teaching Students to be Community Leaders

    Thanks for joining us again for a Coaching in the Classroom / CIC update! November 8 was election day 2011. As it's an "off" year, meaning the president isn't elected, so, sadly, fewer people made the trek to the polls to cast their ballots to elect their leadership. In fact, in our county, some elections were won by one vote! Your voice counts!

    When you have the opportunity, please vote in whatever elections are taking place in your communities. This privilege is important in any town, but for rural areas, here's why we feel citizen engagement and knowledge is critical.

    We took about 30 students to city hall in Coon Rapids, where we teach every week, to meet with Mayor Keith Dorpinghaus and City Clerk, Jesica Leighty. The students asked some really good questions, had a tour of the building, saw future development plans for the city, and learned about the importance of elections.

    The reason this is really, really important for you to model is that we had the students raise their hands and about 20 of them (that's two-thirds of our high-schoolers with whom we work) plan to remain in the area post-graduation. This is a huge opportunity for community leaders and educators to connect with these students and bring them into the life of the community ahead of graduation so they feel WUCA! Welcome, Understood, Comfortable, and Appreciated for their talents, skills, ideas, energy, and enthusiasm!

    We are teaching them to run these communities, because in not too long a period of time, these children are going to be sitting on city councils and school boards (in fact, we are working on getting a student seat soon on these two), on church committees, and will be running for mayor. They need to know how the city operates and part of what we do in CIC is to provide them with some learning they can use in the future in these capacities. So please, head out and vote! Take your student with you! If they are 18, get them registered ahead of time and tell them your feelings about candidates, the political climate, your values, and why you take the time to vote. Your student will likely listen and model you.

    Please feel free to get in touch with us - education is a team sport! Be involved with your students to help them become healthy, productive, engaged leaders!

     

    What You Become Starts With How You Believe You Are

    When you Be WUCA! you will see a transformation in how others act toward you and how you feel about yourself! I have learned that as you think, you become, as do your expectations. It takes effort, but with a little practice and some outside coaching, you will be able to change your inner dialogue and consequently change your outcomes. To become, you have to first believe…

    How do you become a good student?                                    You believe that you are.

    How do you become a good teacher?                                    You believe that you are.

    How do you become a good administrator?                         You believe that you are.

    How do you become a good athlete?                                     You believe that you are.

    How do you become a good coach?                                        You believe that you are.

    How do you become a good musician?                                  You believe that you are.

    How do you become a good debater?                                    You believe that you are

    How do you become a good writer?                                        You believe that you are.

    How do you become a good actor?                                         You believe that you are.

    How do you become a good mentor?                                     You believe that you are.

    How do you become a good parent?                                      You believe that you are.

     Remember the formula:  E+R=O (Event +Response=Outcome)

    When you change your response (belief), you change your outcome. See the difference in these approaches from Global Horizons and Dr. Wayne Dyer:

    From:   "We’ve always fought in this relationship."

    To:        "I’ll work at being peaceful and not allow anyone to bring me down."

    From:   "My children have never shown me any respect."

    To:        "I intend to teach my children to respect all of life, and I’ll treat them in the same way."

    From:   "I’m so annoyed with my family. They just don’t understand me and they never have."

    To:        "I love my family; they don’t see things my way, but I don’t expect them to. I’m totally focused on my own intention, and I send them love."

    From:   "I make myself sick trying to please everyone else."

    To:        "I’m on purpose and doing what I signed up to do in this lifetime."

    From:   "I feel so unappreciated by those I serve that it sometimes makes me cry."

    To:        "I do what I do because it’s my purpose and my destiny to do so."

    From:   "No matter what I do or say, it seems as if I can’t win."

    To:        "I do what my heart tells me to do with love, kindness, and beauty."

    “Why is everyone here so happy except me?"

    "Because they have learned to see goodness and beauty everywhere," said the Master.

    ‘Why don’t I see goodness and beauty everywhere?’

    "Because you cannot see outside of you what you fail to see inside.

    When you change your response to situations to a new way of looking at the world, your world will change. Make it a habit this week that you will move from not believing in yourself to believing that you will literally move toward what you believe and think about.

     Let no one stand between you and your belief. It is the only thing that has built dreams, created ambitions, and achieved success. Be WUCA!

    Searching for Your Eagle

    What level of leader are you?

    • Eagles always make things happen
    • Eagles see and seize opportunities
    • Eagles influence the opinions and actions of others
    • Eagles add value to you and to the organization
    • Eagles draw eagles to them
    • Eagles provide ideas which help the organization
    • Eagles posses an uncommon great attitude
    • Eagles live up to their word

    John Maxwell talks about his “Five Levels of Leadership” in  his books.  Where do you land as a  leader?  What kind of leader do you follow and respect?

    POSITION Rights

    Influence will not extend beyond the lines of your job description. People follow because they have to.  The longer you stay here, the higher the turnover and the lower the morale.

    PERMISSION Relationships

    People follow because they want to.  People will follow you beyond your stated authority.  This level allows work to be fun. Caution:  Staying too long on this level without rising will cause highly motivated people to become restless.

    PRODUCTION Results

    People follow because of what you have done for the organization.   This is where success is sensed by most people.  They like you and what you are doing.  Problems are fixed with very little effort because of momentum.

    PEOPLE DEVELOPMENT Reproduction

    People follow because of what you have done for them. This is where long-range growth occurs.  Your commitment to developing leaders will insure ongoing growth to the organization and to people.  Do whatever you can to achieve and stay on this level.

    PERSONHOOD Respect

    People follow because of who you are and what you represent. This step is reserved for leaders who have spent years growing people and organizations.  Few make it.  Those who do are bigger than life.

    You want to choose a level that you are comfortable with to lead.  Always strive to move up the list to become the best leader you can. Leadership is all about getting other people to become what they can become.  Give a hand-up and you will receive rewards that you could not imagine.

    Discover Your Purpose Through Be WUCA! Coaching

    When 10 years from now is over, will you look back and wonder "where did those 10 years go?" Will you be asking yourself the question of "why am I still doing what I am doing?"

    Whether you do something different or not, ten years from now will happen anyway. The choice you have to make immediately is that you can discover your purpose now and live it in the next 10 years or you can wait the same 10 years and look back and ask "why am I still doing what I am doing?"

    Discovering your purpose is one of the most fulfilling exercises that you can do. Living your purpose is the most fulfilling life that you can live. When you live your purpose, you will help other people discover and live theirs.

    Start now! Take some time now to ask yourself, "Am I living my purpose?"

     Score each statement with 1- low and 5 – high

     ‗  I recognize what I am good at doing.

    ‗  I fully utilize my most enjoyed skills and interests at work.

    ‗  My work furthers issues that I care deeply about.

    ‗  I am making a difference through my work in the world.

    ‗  I view most workdays with enthusiasm.

    ‗  I have developed my own philosophy on life and success.

    ‗  I take the necessary risks to live my philosophy.

    ‗  I feel a sense of meaning and purpose in my life.

    ‗  I have written goals that relate to my purpose.

    ‗  I live my life now instead of hoping that life will work out someday.

    The higher the total, the closer you are to living your purpose.

     Find your purpose as an individual: what is the best use of your time, talent and passion? Have a conversation with your coach about your occupation. 

    Why do I have the job I have?

    Who does my work serve?

    What do they do with what I provide?

    Do they in turn, help others with what I give them?

    Is there integrity in what I do for a living?

    If I could be doing anything I wanted to do, assured that all my living expenses and material needs and desires would somehow be fulfilled, would I be working where I currently am employed or operate?

    Are there any negative aspects to my work? Can I change any negative aspects?

    What is positive about my work?

    Can I achieve my purpose only in this job?

    Do I wake up in the morning excited for the day, or do I dread what is ahead of me?

    If I could wake up every morning, excited to face the day and eager to get to work, what would that day look like?

    Decide to have a Be WUCA!(c) coaching session. It just might be the best 10 year investment that you could ever make.

    Be WUCA!

    The Need for Approval from Others

    "You must begin to trust yourself. If you do not, then you will forever be looking to others to prove your own merit to you, and you will never be satisfied. You will always be  asking others what to do and at the same time resenting those from whom you seek such aid." Author unknown When we are growing up, we are constantly told what do by others. Other people shape us and teach us about the world and ourselves. Rarely are we encouraged to listen to ourselves: our hearts, bodies, and minds. We are taught to value other's opinions more than our own.

    Trusting ourselves is, therefore, something that doesn't come easily, and loving  ourselves is almost impossible, because we seek to please others and not ourselves. Just think, if we were all to take individual responsibility for our own lives and our own happiness, then there would be no need to call anyone else selfish, because we would not be dependent on others to make us happy or to validate our worth.

    Lou Holtz, the great football coach said, “If you desperately need people to like you, you will never have their respect. You must be willing to tell people when they do not meet the standards of excellence and you must be willing to correct their mistakes. You must be willing to look for the things people do right. More importantly, if we catch people doing things right, that will motivate them and make them enthusiastic and give them the passion to do the correct thing.”

    Holding people accountable for their actions is an important step in leadership. Building people up to become what they can become requires accountability. A person cannot become what they can become when they do anything halfway. When a person does not do their best, they not only cheat other people, but they cheat themselves.  Everyone loses out on something that they can get of value from you.

    The best way to become the best you can become is to be of service to others. So what does lead to success for people?

    1. Have passion for what you do.

    2. Persist and work through all of the rejections, critisisms, and people that will tell you you will not succeed.

    3. Be good at what you do.

    4. Listen and observe others and solve their problems.

    5. Serve others something of value.

    The best way to get approval from others, is to give others approval. A leader isn't good because they are right, they are good because they are willing to learn from others and to trust others.

    Be WUCA!(c) to others. Be Welcome, Understand, Comfort, and Appreciate!

    Coaching in the Classroom - students at risk?

    If you have a student in an Iowa public school, you'll be interested in following what we do with Coaching in the Classroom (CIC). If you don't live in Iowa, CIC concepts work anywhere! We have begun our third year working with 7th - 12th-graders in the Coon Rapids-Bayard School District. We'll use this CIC blog to give a weekly update of our activities, giving you conversation starters to consider implementing in your own homes with your own families and we bet you learn something about each other in the process!

    Let's start with some basic info.

    When a child begins kindergarten in Iowa, full of life, energy, ideas, and attitude, the school district, under direction from the Iowa Department of Education, begins to track their behaviors. Behaviors that we use from the DE are these: if students are tardy to school and/or class, have low scores on standardized tests like Iowa Test of Basic Skills, are failing any classes, and are not participating in extracurricular activities. If a student meets any two of these four criteria, the local school district and the DE consider them "at-risk" of not graduating on time with their class.

    In the CR-B district, to uphold their mission to educate all students, high school students with at least two criteria become students of Coaching in the Classroom, where they have the opportunity to learn a host of concepts not regularly found in general classroom settings. We know that many students with whom we work are more "creative" in school, and tend to have a more difficult time being a successful student. They likely will be the students who either attend a two-year trade or community college program, or enter the workforce upon graduating from high school. These students will likely run our towns in rural areas someday. To encourage and engage them, CIC teaches workplace and social skills, leadership behaviors, character development, positive communication, and citizenship, expecting that they will be future mayors, sit on school boards, church committees, city councils and boards of supervisors.

    Two critical things to keep in mind:

    • the local school district is not punishing the student by keeping track of them and their behaviors. In fact, watching students is an excellent way to encourage them to take school more seriously and encourage them to try new things.
    • whether or not a student is considered "at-risk" is completely within their own power to change. All that needs to be done is get to school and class on time. Take tests seriously and do their best. Study hard so they pass all their classes. Sign up for an activity to learn some teamwork or new skills. School officials look at behaviors each semester and if a student has changed their own behavior so that DE criteria no longer pertains to them, they are off the "at-risk" list.

    Check with your school's office to see how your child measures up. Then take the opportunity to shape some successful behaviors with your student. If you need some help, let us know!

    Have a Be WUCA!(c) week!